Alone in my room with the sniffles and apathy in abundance...

I'm siiiiick. :/

I'm tired of being so lazy and tired and apathetic about things going on in my life. For some reason I can't shake the feeling...being bored with life, not growing, not being responsible; it's exhausting.

I want to be the person that people can count on. I want to be the one people can trust and depend on. I'm sick of being the flake, the "oh-it's-Aubrey-who-knows-when-she'll-get-here"...I need to be mature! Why is it so difficult for me to just...strive to be better? I want it with all my heart, but acting on it, putting into my life and keeping the healthy habits there...I hate being afraid that I'll be the one mom who forgets to pick up her kids at soccer practice or is late to their game, or accidentally blows off a friend in need, or any circumstances that have that sort of taint to it. I don't want that for my life.

By the way, I'm also tired of closing off who I really am and what I really struggle with. It's exhausting to pretend that everything is okay, so this blogging thing is going to be transparent. I believe that transparency is really important for the Christian community because we need to encourage others...

Anyway, I'm just waiting for my Geography class to start so I can take the quiz and go to the doctor. Thanks for letting me ramble.